SPECIAL MOTH – SQUAREPUSHER STOLE MY BARBEQUE
It’s probably wrong to have a music obsessed boyfriend and ask him what he thinks of your record collection. But IF LUVVIN YOU IS WRONG, I DON’T WANNA BE RIGHT or in other words, I went […]

I’ll see your Death in Vegas and raise you one Sophie Ellis-Bextor auditioning to be a BOND GURL. I read this in the PRINTED PAGES of your Local NME, whereupon one tiny second of checking their source showed it to be on dodgy Bond fansite &#822[…]

Dear Novocane feat No Ones Driving, top dodgy trance bods,
first of all, come on. Now is not the time for FITES and being VERSUS! It is Christmas! Even if there is a new (ha!) Tupac single out which I am sure means that some Americans will write pome[…]

Poor Brian Harvey, just been attacked in Nottingham by YOOFS with a machete. Where does one find machetes in Nottingham, I wonder? How puzzling. Is a machete usually the scalping instrument of choice in the Midlands? Either that or there is a MULTINA[…]

I’m here for ALE, not GALLIANO! Blimey charley I must say that my Local Pub (the Hero of Switzerland just across from our flat which is the nearest pub is local ‘local’, if you know what I mean) is a seething mass of contradictions.[…]

THE ESSEX GREEN MING
I can SMELL it coming and it honks like a bastard. It smells a little bit like a very old pair of corduroy flares bought from what those crazy Americans call a thrift store. They’ve seen a lot of action and the bottom is ra[…]

“A pint of lager and a vodka and slimlime tonic please”. It’s wrong to laugh at the people who say “slimline” instead of “diet”, I’m sure it is. But what if it’s just post-work, you’re in a […]