ADVENT CALENAR OF FILTH
8: ROY WOOD & WIZZARD – I Wish It Could Be Christmas Everyday
The archetypal Christmas song in both its lack of any redeeming features and nonsensical lyrics. Shall we start with the non-philosophical problems here?[…]

You didn’t expect to see this amongst the hoary old chestnuts roasting on an open hell-fire below. If you didn’t then you obviously still do not understand this site, and you are also possibly deaf. The man with a lifejacket for lips and […]

THE ADVENT CALENDAR OF FILTH
6: JOHN LENNON & THE PLASTIC ONO BAND : Merry Christmas (War Is Over)
Much has been said on this very site about the utter wretchedness of John Lennon?s solo career. This track has escaped much lampooning so far pret[…]

THE ADVENT CALENDAR OF FILTH
5 JONA LEWIE – Stop The Cavalry
Jona Lewie looked like he’d been slapped every day of his miserable life. His hangdog face matched his awful flat voice and his awful voice was backed up with a casio your kid s[…]

THE ADVENT CALENDAR OF FILTH
4: WINGS – Wonderful Christmastime
The Beatles never made a Christmas single. Unless you include those fanclub flexi’s where John Lennon does his amusing John Lennon voice and tells jokes you would only allow […]

There are crudely two ways of marketing a Christmas single. That’s because crudely (and these are Christmas singles so sophistication is right out of the window) there are two types of Yuletide tune. There is the gung-ho, sleigh-bell a-jangling[…]

THE ADVENT CALENDER OF FILTH
2: BAND AID 2 : Do They Know Its Christmas
You see all I’ve said about the first release of this song below. Well that 2 after this version of Band Aid is squaring the awfulness of the song (and that’s times t[…]

TANYA’S ADVENT CALENDER OF FILTH
Welcome dear reader to the undisputed section of my Pandora’s Box of vileness. No-one, not even a fool who wished it could be Christmas everyday, can honestly say that Christmas records are any good. This[…]

BRYAN FERRY – From Roxy Music to Poxy Music
It?s a conundrum. The organisers of Miss World 2000, looking through their post-ironic lenses, have to choose a venue, a host and a musical star for their event. Of course, this year’s Miss Wo[…]

THOMAS DOLBY – “She Blinded Me With Science”
Time has been harsh to Mr Dolby. Not only has he been usurped by THX in all but the most flea-bitten of cinema’s but now rock history sees him as the poor mans Howard Jones. And con[…]