What is this I see before me? — the nature of music and its availability being what it is, I really don’t ask for music as Christmas gifts anymore, though this time around I did ask for one specific thing, Black Sabbath’s Black Box.[…]

There is a moment in Vera Drake (it is in the trailer too so you don’t actually have to go and see the film) when the police turn up and ask to see Vera. Previously the family have been having a party, and the police intrude. Imelda Staunton ac[…]

Day 1: London Town
AROUND THE WORLD IN 80 LOUSY TUNES

Without further ado, I hotfooted it (note, I did not hotstep – I save that for terrorising Ini Kamoze) back to my London pad. As I burst through the door I caught my valet Crispian De Savar[…]

REASONS WHY PEOPLE HATE BENJY’S
Would you buy a sandwich from this dog?[…]

“I think that is quite enough salt to soak up the red wine.”
“Well you’ve only got yourself to blame, pisshead.”
“It doesn’t work if you never empty the hoover bag.”
All phrases we may soon be hearing a[…]

That Subway Smell. The legend has it that the smell of freshly brewed coffee or baking bread can add thousands to your property price, and make the place more attractive to potential buyers. An extension to this surely is The Subway Smell, assaulting[…]

THE FOLLOWING IS A TRUE STORY
My brother and a friend were in a pub near Blackpool once when Irish funnyman Frank Carson walked out of the powder room, rubbing his hands, proclaiming “It’s a cracker”.
Unfortunately they did not take[…]

Great Television Listings Of Our Time, pt. 95822:
BBC1, next Monday:
9:15 a.m. – Beat the Burglar
Dominic Littlewood presents a home security series where a family watches every second of their house being burgled so it will never happen to th[…]

EXPERIMENT: AYINGERBRAU
The question was, what happens when I drink exclusively Ayingbrau of an evening? The location was The Blue Posts Newman Street. And the occasion was Magnus’s birthday. The results?
People have suggested that plenty of ot[…]

“Rock Legend” gets only 14p busking. I’m not surprised. It would only be polite to wait until he finished a song before giving the money. And half an hour is barely two and a half wives of Henry The Eighth.
This is a favourite news […]