Sharks, like crocodiles, have been around forever. They are the reknowned uber-predator, indeed if they had added sharks to the mix in Aliens vs Predators vs Sharks, the swimming ones would have won*. Sharks used to eat the odd T-Rex for lunch and are around today being cool and content in their evolutionary position as the anti-panda. Yes this makes them interesting creatures, BUT, does it justify quite the amount of television time they get on National Geographic TV. Of course not. The majesty of the phrase SHARK ATTACK does the justifying all by itself.

So much so that even when it is not really a shark attack at all, brer Great White can make it on to the news. Last Friday’s news, a slack affair admittedly, still had much room for this story: Man Escapes No Danger Whatsoever In Shark Attack. The story was simple. A man was on a shark watching trip, and they saw a shark. Man gets in SHARKPROOF CAGE which the shark then attacks to no avail. Man is never in danger. However, someone takes some great footage of a shark attacking a cage and its eyes rolling back in that super scary shark way. Not news in any way shape or form, but the nearest the News At Ten bongs are going to get to the Der-Der of the Jaws theme.

*If there had been any water of course, the one reason sharks do not rule the world.