The Armadillo illegal? Much as supping on the wrong side of the law might make me look harder, I refute the allegation that the ‘dillo falls foul of the 1963 Act. The recipe for the Cider A is as follows: take a pint of cider and a single sherry. Take a swig of your cider and then add the sherry to what is now a slightly less than full glass. Serves one.

I challenge you to take legal issue with that, m’lud. The lager top, on the other hand, is clearly illegal. It is also immoral and must be driven out from any civilised society.