As part of my job, I am the recipient of lost property, contents of unused lockers and the like at a university. These usually sit on a shelf until claimed, however yesterday I was contacted regarding the contents of a locker which the student no longer wanted. “Give the contents away” he said from Dubai. So I went through the books to distribute to new students, and thought I would claim as my payment a packet of Quavers. Lovely, lovely quavers, the cheese corn puff curl which both crunches and is insubstantial. A hard mans Skip, a weak mans crisp. Moreish in all the best ways.
The locker had been in use recently I had assumed by the phonecall, accidentally left full at the end of September. Unfortunately the same could not be said of the Quavers. After eating the first one, I noticed something wasn’t right. Checking ont he packet I discovered the truth. The Quavers had an expiry date of the 30/12/08. They were ten months out of date. So what happens to cheesy Quavers after they have expired?
They taste of Humbol Messerschmitt Grey Enamel Paint. Who knew?*
*Note, I know what this paint tastes like from an accidental brush sucking moment as a child when painting an airfix kit.
I still have a packet of Crispy Duck & Hoisin flavour crisps by my computer, which I was going to review. I daresay they haven’t aged well since their best before date…
I have a feeling it was more the technology behind machining the perfect corn packing chip that Quavers are made of which caused the flavour lack rather than the cheesy powder (which was still evident).