Moving Towards A Unified Theory Of Pop Music: This is possible the ultimate goal of NYLPM, though one which is rarely stated since many of our pop boffins secret believe it is impossible. Nevertheless I think I made a key discovery last night: all decent pop records can be read in a filthy way (let us call this Baran’s Law for now). Take probably my favourite pop song of the year so far: Christina Milian’s “AM to PM”. On the surface a chirpy, very well produced piece of fluff about having a long party. But when examined closer the lyrics are about being “thrown to the floor” and “someone switching out the lights”. The reason for the lights being switched out is suddenly clear – this is an orgy. Which explains “from the front to the back” and indeed the odd title. “AM to PM”. I mentioned before that all good parties go from PM to AM, so this seemed an unusual mistake to make. However closer examination and tying in with the “from the front to the back” line garners an alternative reading. AM is short for Anti-Meridian, PM for Post Meridian. If we take the meridian of the human body as running through the middle of the body – suddenly we see this is merely another way of distinguishing sexual positions. Depending on whether we take the meridian as being the waist or a line running horizontally through the hips its still quite, quite explicit. In an implict way of course.

19 year old Milian: So sweet and yet so dirty.