Day 27: Subterranean Homesick Alien
AROUND THE WORLD IN 80 LOUSY TUNES
Deftu’s citadel on the moon (I just love starting sentences like that) turned out to be really rather luxurious. If it was not for the constant piped music it would have bee[…]

Day 26: Clouds Across The Moon
AROUND THE WORLD IN 80 LOUSY TUNES
I had to admit that I never expected to die on the Moon. Traveling to the moon was never really on my to do list (unlike rolling some heavy stones on the Rolling Stones and thinking u[…]

Day 25: Dark Side Of The Moon
AROUND THE WORLD IN 80 LOUSY TUNES
Picture this, a lady of leisure in a spacesuit, weightless, sucking neat gin through a straw. Perhaps it is not what I had planned when I embarked on this epic quest around the world, b[…]

Day 24: Fly Me To The Moon
AROUND THE WORLD IN 80 LOUSY TUNES
I awoke with a rudimentary fishbowl on my head and my manservant Crispian De Savary gurning over me in a similar helmet. I could not help noticing that we were both floating as if we were […]

Day 23: Saturn V
AROUND THE WORLD IN 80 LOUSY TUNES
A pallet in the back yard of a boathouse is not the worst place I have ever slept (that would be Wembley Arena during a Van Morrison concert) but it was pretty uncomfortable. I was up fresh in the m[…]

Day 22: Miami
AROUND THE WORLD IN 80 LOUSY TUNES
(Sorry for the delay: this Herculean outpouring required a Herculean actual pouring of gin. Fear not though dear reader as I expect another straight twenty days or so to be recounted over the next mont[…]

Day 21: The Devil Went Down To Georgia
AROUND THE WORLD IN 80 LOUSY TUNES
I slept the night in a Jersey Bus Station feeling like an unclean tramp. I spent about half an hour int he toilets just to wash off the general Tom Waitsiness off of my body. I[…]

Day 20: New Jersey
AROUND THE WORLD IN 80 LOUSY TUNES
After my random act of arson the night before, I managed to bed down in a church which kept open all night in Harlem. Pews are not all that comfortable, but it was the rude awakening I got the nex[…]

Day 19: The Block Party
AROUND THE WORLD IN 80 LOUSY TUNES
Ah the gleaming skyscrapers of Manhattan island. A beautiful, beautiful sight. That said, the bars on the ground floor of a lot of these edifices were the most beautiful thing, and as soon as[…]

Day 18: Hey Manhattan
AROUND THE WORLD IN 80 LOUSY TUNES
Simone was true to her word, she knew a metal shop. Not just a shop which sold metal, it was run bey a metal shopkeeper or as I would put it, an ironmonger. Heavy Metal Gates of Coney Island. I[…]