“New Kicks”

I admit, I’ve never really been much of a Kathleen Hanna fan outside of one or two bits and pieces. I’m all for righteous energy and hatred of fools, but that just won’t translate into good music all of the time for every listener. Still, clearly much of what she’s done from Bikini Kill onward has had an impact, and the channelling of that energy into many different forms via many different listeners — folks I know who work in music on many levels, or that used her work as a source of inspiration — is quite something.

But when even a slew of long-time fans started venting on ILM about this new song — their major label debut single (I didn’t even know they had signed to a major!) — I knew I had to listen to see what the shouting was all about.

And Jesus H. Christ on a crutch, what a piece of unmitigated, uninteresting shit. Single as ‘political’ ‘event’ ‘representing’ ‘the people’ — and all my hatred for didacticism in any medium comes roaring back, but especially when there’s no sense of humor, when all the ‘fun’ is enforced dumbass cheer via cheerleading, when the timing is so spectacularly OFF that this is nothing more than retrospective celebration of a failed attempt to stop something. Believe me, I’m glad the attempt was made, but it’s been over a year now.

But then again, as everyone knows, I always prioritize the music. And guess what! IT’S LAMER THAN THE LAME DONKEY ONE MIGHT FIND IN A FAIRY STORY CALLED “THE LAME DONKEY THAT WAS LAME, AND A DONKEY.” I mean cripes, is it really THAT hard to avoid actually trying for something that at least sounds great, body-hit beats and twisted structures and dancefloor rushes? This stuff would have been rejected as soundtrack material for Strange Days back in 1994.

But hey, don’t take MY word for it. Listen in — and there’s no need to thank me.