Are ACADEMIC CONFERENCES the SPORT of THOUGHT?

(viz CONTENT vs STYLE who will WIN??)

i. see you get up and say stuff and (if you don’t overrun yr time hem hem) then field clever questions
ii. and some ppl carefully write every word up beforehand and read it all out in a mymble mumble
iii. and some ppl use mannered rhetorical language that reads fine(ish) on the page and just weird and forced and poncey out loud
iv. and other ppl just have the whole whatever in their head and stand up and SPEAK, which is WAY preferable except timing is v. hard (shout out to infinite thought who lent me her WATCH!!) (plus also xenakis is v.fiddly and so is the science of stochastiXoRz, so i actually had a lot written down and as usual too much to SAY and RAN OVER and bleugh)
v. some ppl don’t actually cover the topic trumpeted in the pre-release abstract (but i WOULD HAVE if i had another five hours mins!!) (the very first time i did one of these one of my co-panellists switched at last minute from talkn abt the implications for photograph in the age of digital shenanigans as per promo to BAH YUK THE GULF WAR (= gulf war the elder) SO i wz suddenly stuck ambushed next to him talkn abt HURRAH SHINY POP (in the AGE of WAR)! in the same panel – his name wz kevin something and i will forgive him when they pry the fuzzy end of the lollipop from my COLD DEAD hand er where wz i?
vi. some ppl dye their hair pink and pick sexy sulky indie as their topic so get ALL THE ETERNAL STUDENTS in THEIR PANEL’S AUDIENCE grrr cz the panels clashed
vii. and sometimes ppl are audiences draws and quasi-avant popsters in their own right: score here, z’ev speaks off top-of-head, charming, rambling, not very focused (he sed he’d left his notes behind); bennett gave an awesome, sinister, content-free performance, like a new age motivational speaker, VERY controlling, VERY manipulative (haha good question at the end: “Do you really expect us to believe all that?”
viii. and all the while in the audience everyone cattily dissects their rivals’ work based on the SILLY WAY THEY PRONOUNCED “alterity” or HAHA THAT HAIR!
ix. but sadly some ppl had to leave early to get some sleep b4 final score announced (= not WINNERS but LOSERS) :(
except PS as i slinked away safe’s set wz just starting and ALL THE WINDOWS IN THE BUILDING WERE RATTLIN AND SHAKIN it wz like the calculus affair!!