MOTHER! MOTHER! BLOOD! BLOOD!
In a slight deviation from our promised schedule, I’d like to point out this review of the best comic ever published, which thoughtfully reproduces all the really juicy bits for making into screensavers, wallpapers, T-shirts etc…
Old punks, beware, eh? Apparently, not even John Lydon going walkies is enough to halt the roll of the reality-media machine. Don’t say that he’s getting responsible in his old age? I can’t help wondering if he truly got into a tantrum over his sitz bath going cold….and whether the media thought that writing about his fire dance would make better copy.
The pity is that I’m missing actually interesting UK reality TV for US TV crap like American Idol. No justice, I tell you. Scarier still that I’d even think about watching….
Nick in Do You See • No Comments
Someone at work told me they recently encountered Hillegonda, once of fabled Factory erm “avant-funksters” Quando Quango: of course today she is a CultStud academic lecturing in “Dance Theory”…
Which is cool and dandy I guess: but DO YOU SEE why it is not (necessarily) any cooler or dandier than this?
pˆnk s lord sükråt cunctør in FT /New York London Paris Munich • No Comments
A new series in Proven by Science — punXoR science textbook reviews!
ADVANCED ORGANIC CHEMISTRY Francis A. Carey and Richard J. Sundberg
The book is a frighteningly large paperback, about the size and weight of a David Foster Wallace novel and less readable. The cover color borders between inviting fuchsia and cold purple. The text appears to be completely set in Times New Roman, tipoff number one to the gentle reader that this book is serious and traditional. A quick flip through the book reveals all black text on white paper, with no pastels to be found. The paper isn’t even glossy, and all of the pictures — of molecules, spectra, and various reaction mechanisms — are in black and white. What’s up with this? The text is dry, but earnestly written, and the drama of the carbonyl group and its spicy leanings leave enough for the eager student of chemistry (or psychoactive drug experimenter) without necessity on the author’s part to sprinkle in several gratuitous photos of handsome, aloof Werner Heisenberg in his early 20s to hold the reader’s interest. Read this book, and learn important words like “homoaromaticity” and “cyclopropylmethyl singlet diradical” to spout nonchalantly at your office’s next cocktail party to confound and impress your colleagues. Alternately, they’ll just think you’re a pretentious bastard, but they probably thought that already.
Rating: 1.5 out of 5 stars.
Best match ever, greatest comeback ever, greatest save ever, blah blah blah. Naturally there have been much better games, games with more excitement or passion or skill or whatever, but this one was fairly amazing. I suspect that if Tottenham vs Manchester City in the FA Cup had been a Saturday game, rather than one of two attractions on an otherwise barren evening* the superlatives may have been tempered. I watched the game on the radio because there was nothing on the telly last night. Even with all the goals it didn’t seem to have the blood or the thunder which the scoreline suggests.
Three things though, stick in the mind:
1. A paragraph of classic McCarra in the Guardian: “We have let ourselves down and the supporters will be gutted,” said the Spurs manager David Pleat, speaking from that depth of suffering in which people communicate solely through numb phrases.”
2. The Five Live commentator losing his voice as Macken slotted the fourth City goal in, and letting out little more than a squawk of disbelief which said so much more than one of those awful, rehearsed Jonathan Pearce pat lines.
3. At least three separate death metaphors: Macken scored ‘at the death’ according to (I think) Lineker on MotD; City ‘looked dead and buried at half time’ according to Hansen on the same programme; and Keegan came out with a Keggy classic ‘long after we’re dead and six feet under or’ or cremated or whatever we decide to do with ourselves, they’ll be talking about this game”
We all know that the old Shankley ‘it’s more important than that’ is nonsense, of course we do. Don’t we?
*Barren? When Exeter beat the mighty Kings Lynn to progress in the FA Trophy? What am I saying?
Tim in TMFD • No Comments
A Lucky Escape! – what would have happened if Lydon had walked 3 days earlier. It doesn’t bear thinking about. (Caution: pics contain ‘fun’).
Tom in Do You See • No Comments
RIP MP3sFinder: I will miss this site a lot, a fantastic resource for current pop. It generally had things first, it was easy to use, its downloads were fast and for most of its life it even eschewed pop-up ads. I also liked its singles-only, chart-only aesthetic. Time to start hunting for a replacement, I suppose.
TOP TEN COMICS OF 2003: NUMBER NINE
Or, “If you bought one book in 2003, why wasn’t it this one?”
In the closing moments of 2003, I noted that Buffy The Vampire Slayer had won the coveted 13th place in the 100 Greatest Musicals Of All Time on Channel 4 for the episode with songs in it. Well, if something that’s patently not a musical can score highly in the Top Musicals Of, Well, Ever, then surely something that’s patently not a comic can take ninth place in the Top Comics Of One Measly Year. That’s LOGIC.
Which brings us to THE EXTRAORDINARY WORKS OF ALAN MOORE. Which is a book. But it has comics in it, and it’s about comics, so let’s call it a comic. What it actually is is a nice large, graphic-novel-sized Autobiography Of Alan Moore. I say autobiography because it comes in the form of a series of interviews between George Khoury and Moore that span the writer’s entire life from birth to date-of-publication, so it’s mostly Moore talking about his own work rather than an entire community of artists desperately trying to squeeze all their tongues into his arse (like certain other celebratory Moore-is-50 books I could mention). As you can imagine, it’s full of all kinds of tasty insights, not only into Moore’s work but into more general ideas of comics, culture and being a writer. And more often than not, very funny to boot. Not surprising, really, as Moore didn’t get to be the most well-known writer in comics by being dull and Khoury’s undeniable skill as an interviewer means that this all crackles along at a merry, friendly pace without any of the trite, overly-mawkish sentiment that spoiled the other 50th birthday book. (I’m a big fan of Ilya’s, but his bit in that was particularly horrible. While we’re on the subject.)
In other words, this isn’t an endless queue of writers, artists and assorted lining up to suck Moore’s immense bibliography – you?re paying for the man himself to demonstrate visibly in your face why they would, at length and in style. So for God’s sake, when you go off to Border’s to get the “Alan Moore Fiftieth Birthday Thingy”, MAKE SURE YOU BUY THE RIGHT ONE.
LENTIL MENTAL!! Although I’m neglecting the great Guest Editor position by actually posting something in my week of Do You See overlordism, I must admit to a sense of loss now Johnny Rotten has walked from I’m A Celebrity Get Me Out Of Here. First of all, there is no indication he actually SAID the famous phrase* and second of all now the ONLY story we’re going to get is a bit of sweaty fumbling between Peter Andre and Jordan. Gargh! ** Aren’t they brilliant though? Were we ever informed of Peter Andre’s luxury item? My betting is that it’s VALIUM.
However once I read the below I now think Johnny is forgiven:
Prior to leaving the set, he apparently started a fire at the edge of camp, then stamped out the flames shouting “I’m doing the dance. I’m doing the pogo. Lentil Mental. I’ve gone lentil mental.”
LENTIL MENTAL! Someone get this man on Big Brother!
*has anybody actually said it yet? No doubt Kerry McFadden, the dozy ole bint. I have no doubt her knockers are real BTW, why do people think they’re not?
**although it’s marvellous actually, isn’t it?
Sarah in Do You See • No Comments