So Mourinho gets a two match ban then. Let us set aside the issue of whether or not Mourinho has brought the game into disrepute: frankly only football would equate “making something more entertaining” with “disrepute”. What are the particulars of a two match ban?

Well according to the rules he cannot be on the touchline but must be in the stands. He can of course talk to his team before, half-time and after the game and of course coach them all the way up to it. If one assumes the team will know where in the stands he will be, and that he will be in constant touch via mobile phone to the bench, is there any actually punitive value to this punishment at all? Jose if anything will get a slightly better view. The rules say nothing about where in the stands, so “just behind the dugout” would be fine. There must be better ways of enforcing this.

Let us just hope that Carlos Alberto does not get the same treatment for his even more entertaining diatribe against Michael Owen: THE MIDGET.