I went into a Wetherspoon’s last night. Something I now rarely do (outside of airports). This one, The Asparagus in Wandsworth, was as bog standard as most. And indeed the standard of the bogs belied the name of the pub. I have not been in pub toilets which have stank so much in years.

Still settling down to my half of mild I had chance to peruse the drinks selection. It would appear that with their new range they are not only targeting cash strapped OAP binge drinkers, but have an eye on the money conscious Eastern European migrant worker buck too. Bottles of Zwyiek for under two quid, and three other Eastern European lagers available is clearly aiming at this batch. And as usual, the beers in a Wetherspoon’s were well kept and tasty (my Titanic Mild was excellent). But god: the pubs are so free of atmosphere and depressing joints. Who cares how cheap or interesting the beer is?

There will be more from Wetherspoon’s News in the next couple of days, including the frightening range of ciders and perrys now availible, but here is this nice piece of PR flummery. “Wetherspoon’s have spent 1 million pounds* converting all our pubs in Scotland to non-smoking”. How much do No Smoking signs cost!

*One assumes Scottish Pounds.