The heroic era of my Pringle consumption is behind me, of course. Those were the days when it was discovered that Sour Cream and Chive pringles must contain heroin as a secret ingredient, so addictive were they – and also that eating a whole barrel last thing at night was the sleepful equivalent of two strong cups of coffee.

Anyway I still like and also I am I must admit fond of Lord of the Rings, but I have to say that putting scenes from The Return of the King – which is to say of a fantasy war in which thousands will die horribly – on the container kind of totally uglifies the primary colourness of their design sense, plus puts totally the wrong things in your head as regards brainless snacking, plus haha is that spinning I hear down in that grave?