Food anti-rockism alert… I’m through with making stuff from scratch. I made a jerk paste with my bare hands the other week — lots of lovely ingredients (all spice berries, cinnamon, spring onions, er, other stuff), a modicum of fun with the mortar and pestle — but frankly I’m going for a bag of jerk seasoning in future. I mean we’ve all (many of us) had a go at making mayonnaise from scratch, but you do it, think “Right, I’ve proved it’s possible” and then forget about it.

Not unconnected, my new food god is Rajah All-Purpose Seasoning. This stuff is rocking so hard. It’s got all the usual suspects: chilli, coriander, garlic, MSG, onion powder. Stop messing about with a shelf full of little packets, and buy the one big bag of lovely brown powder. Do it.