An ongoing Food Science Day enquiry is to determine whether tasty recipes can be derived from appalling puns. Previous experiments such as Lychees on Toast and the almost legendary Thymey Calaloo Dow’s Port have shown that there is much potential in this bold new approach. Our explorations continued this year with the creation of PERRY PERRY CHICKEN.

AIM: To cook a chicken in two types of perry.

APPARATUS: Chicken, bottle of Pink Lady sparkling perry (5.5%), bottle of Waitrose Vintage perry (8%), oil, oven, frying pan, roasting dish, people who know what they’re doing to wrangle chicken and provide cooking tips (thanks Chris & Vicky!).

METHOD: The chicken was jointed and the portions browned in a little oil then placed in the roasting dish. A few slugs of Pink Lady were used to deglaze the pan and the mix poured over the chicken. Roughly equal quantities of the Pink Lady and the Waitrose posh perry were poured into the dish until the chicken was almost covered. The dish was then covered with tinfoil and placed in the oven. After poaching at 180 degrees for about 45 minutes, the chicken was uncovered and poached for a little longer to reduce the liquid.

RESULTS: The poached chicken proved tender and moist throughout and the perry gave the meat a definite but not overpowering sweetness. Add to this the fruity liquor of booze plus meat juices and the result was a very tasty dish indeed.

CONCLUSION: Once again, food and linguistic frivolity prove to be a powerful combination that may yet shake the foundations of culinary thinking. It may even be possible to produce a more complex variation by using a realactual pear to create Peary Perry Chicken. Unfortunately, this wasn’t possible on the day because, as we all know, fruit is for throwing, not cooking.