Yeah, yeah, yeah the wick effect. But really does some slovenly fatso in a terry toweling bathrobe dropping fag ash on himself and then slowly burning for eight hours really match up to the majesty of Spontaneous Human Combustion. Coursnot.
I was fir[…]

What is it with The White Horse on Rupert Street? Why can’t the Fancyapint team see it? Do they harbour a secret grudge against this most brown of Sam Smith’s hostelries? Did they get lost in the funny back stairs before? Or is it their f[…]

There is one fundamental difference between Rock School and School of Rock, and it is not that the former is a documentary whilst the latter is a feel-good comedy. Let’s break it down:
SCHOOL OF ROCK: Slightly overweight band loser teaches kids[…]

It turns up at the end of the article, but the delayed reaction makes it all the more pleasing. Hooray for the Freedom Of Information Act!
Anti-Welsh Probe Cost £3,800[…]

It is like The Butterfly Effect, but the use of frogs in pregnancy tests has now spread a fungal disease which is wiping out amphibians. Hooray for old wives tales!
The wholesale importation of one species to another continent alarmingly has this kin[…]

A Chomp was a cheap chocolate flavoured chew. Defined as such as it had barely sniffed a cocoa bean in its life, and rather was a collection of chemicals wrapped on a wham bar which simulated chocolate. It was about 8p, and since you could buy a prop[…]

PIEDMONT: ITALY A sad looking corpse of a giant pink bunny is found on a mountainside. Authorities are hunting for potentially dangerous giant drunken Jimmy Stewart plundering the Alps somewhere.

Alternatively it could be art.[…]

Okay, the staff are not theatrically rude, as they are in Wong Kei, and this Dalston Vietnamese is much tastier. Nevertheless it is dirt cheap and about as filling as I want my food to be. And it is my first Vietnamese in London that does food like w[…]

In what might be his most daring adventure yet, join boy journalist and his grizzled hairy friend, and Captain Haddock the first stage production of his exciting adventure. At the Young Vic at Christmas.
Rumours that Tom Ewing has been seen muttering[…]

All the things which are wrong about Shark Tale are ironically all the interesting things about it. The fact that most of the jokes do not work unless you know who the vocal talent doing the joke is (Will Smith is playing a yellow fish, therefore it […]