First order of business is obviously the total farce that the 1000th No.1 has descended into. Midweeks are out showing that it’s going to be Elvis again, with a reissue of the not-particularly-great “One Night”. Underwhelming to say the least. Mind you when you look at the alternatives – The Killers and, oh sweet mercy NO the Manic Street Preachers – maybe we should count our blessings. (Actually I must reluctantly back the Killers on the grounds that i) it’s less annoying than their last one and ii) it at least hasn’t been number one before)

What gets me is that no record company seems to have realised that there’s a marketing opportunity here. Not a big one, but a chance for a chart scrap, a bit of publicity in a weak month, maybe a few extra sales. But no – the release schedules are a graveyard and the fattest corpse around is having a clear run. Even the Official Charts Company aren’t making any fuss about the 1000th No.1. Maybe only I care (and I admit I lost perspective on this some while ago). Bring on the sodding download chart and end this sorry business now, I think.