Actually, Maura, you can view the whole ho-hum video here. Blah bling blah. Why am I supposed to care about this video? How is it controversial at all?

Ok, she liberates her granny, tazes a guy at an ATM, sasses some police officers, shoots them with a water gun, and smashes up some mid-life crisis dickmobiles. Big deal. Too much trying hard to be cheeky, not enough actual cheekiness, to say nothing of the appalling lack of stuff for me to care about. Madonna, Guy: Listen up, sweeties. Artistic collaboration works for some couples, but Minelli and Garland you’re not. So please, for the love of all that’s actually entertaining in this world, stop it. Stop right now.

Back to the video: What was the deal with the so-called backstory? Was Madge’s character supposed to be the Devil, w/all those tattoos and the wreaking of havoc, and the Motel Room 666? Or was she just a woman done wrong, on an anti-heroic mission to kick society’s ass on her way out in a non-blaze of non-glory? Someone? Anyone? Bueller? Explain to me why I should care about this video. And why MTV has banned it? In short, what the fuck?

Feh, I say. Give me my “Don’t Tell Me” video and I’ll be a happy girl. One thing I really want to know is this (and maybe someone who has a copy of Music handy will chime in at this point) – who is the woman whose spoken-word bits grace the beginning & end of the track? I love her voice.