SUNSCREEM – Love You More
‘You can make the sun turn purple, you can make the sea turn turtle
But you know you can never make me love you more.’

Don’t look for a rose in a cess-pit is an adage I’ve followed much of my life, so expecting lyrics that make sense from an early nineties dance act would seem futile. Nevertheless in the forest of platitudinal exressions of love, and waving ones hands in the air this lyric stands out as particularly nonsensical. Who is this man who can make the sun turn purple? That is quite impressive. Not as impressive however this act which is described as “Making the sea turn turtle”. Perhaps this is a reference to how turtles can turn over on their back – suggesting that this fella can literally upend the ocean. Either that or he can turn the entirity of a sea, and perhaps even the entire worlds oceans into one huge – oddly shaped turtle. A feat indeed.

There is only one being that can do this – God. And a somewhat frivolous and malevolent god at that (imagine a purple sun and a sea made of turtle- fishermen would be very very pissed off). The existence of Sunscreem – albeit for one terrible summer in 1992 – kind of runs contrary to the existence of a benevolent god anyway. But wait – what else do they say – ‘you could never make me love you more’ . More than what? Since this being can achieve the near impossible it follows that it would be impossible for the rat-tailed, dreadlocked trustafarian to love him at all. Suggesting that she is indeed the devil. A conclusion the music amply backs up.