Posts from 20th April 2007

20
Apr 07

VIEW-WATCH URGENT APPEAL

FT + I Hate MusicPost a comment • 684 views

Friends of the busker men The View are in a spot of pickly bother, readers! They’ve lost their support band, The Horrors. I expect that the so-called Horrors realised what TRUE HORROR was after listening to the View soundcheck. Anyway, they’ve run away as fast as their skinny goth pins will carry them and the View are now asking for a new support band for tonight.

Of course I’d ordinarily hope that nobody applies, but anyone paying to see The View deserves the double dose of pain this scheme will no doubt deliver.

The View state that they are not looking for any particular type of band – just one who is “good”. Which of course begs the question: how the fuck would The View know?. This, as I may have commented before, are the band who have an inferiority complex when it comes to buskers, so it’s no surprise that, after receiving 3 demo tapes within 5 minutes of starting their appeal, they have found themselves with a difficult choice. “The standard so far is really high!” says a gobsmacked Viewite, “We had no idea there were so many good bands around.” Yes, this is because the View are the worst band in the universe and a group of four gibbons with coconut shells would surprise and stun them with their musical quality. It’s like asking a blade of grass to judge a tallest tree content.

BRANDWATCH: Lots A Spam

FT + Pumpkin Publog4 comments • 2,065 views

garlicspam.jpgCarsmile Steve told me last week about the special edition Spamalot tie in Spam which he had seen in the supermarket. Spam with Stinky French Garlic. Yes, yes, that joke is so early seventies now that it almost seems quaint. The WORD Spam will always be funny, it has the spitting opening, the long a (trying to describe why words are inherently funny is a mugs game of course). But the attachment of Garlic to the French seems a bit old hat now, especially as I get through a bulb a week. Perhaps it is the secret of the Spamalot musical, that Monty Python has become the establishment (and thus being anti-French fits its US based demographic). A wee bit of research on the British Spam website however shows that this is not the only new variant “special edition” flavour available in the UK.

»
More

Only Three Cassoulets Left in Him

FT + Proven By Science + Pumpkin PublogPost a comment • 1,037 views

Stumpy the duck is down to three legs. The usual terse reporting from Ananova explains how he got one of his superfluous appendages stuck in a fence and the vet came and harvested a leg for dinner helped free him from his predicament.
stumpy-duck.jpg

»
More