Posts from 3rd August 2006

3
Aug 06

Top Of The Pops: (probably not the) final word

FT43 comments • 2,043 views

Branding expert Mark Ritson in Marketing magazine this week, in his article on the “Ten Branding Lessons” to be learned from ToTP’s demise.

 Brand naming is always more important later, rather than sooner. Yes, Top Of The Pops was a swinging name in 1964, but if only it had consulted a brand-consulting company before rushing into things. Clearly, a name such as Musica or Poporato would have better served the brand over the long haul.

Presented without comment.

A Minor IRK

FT7 comments • 3,744 views

Something that would be banned if I WAS IN CHARGE: those radio and TV quizzes where there are three answers and two are obviously wrong, because there’s some law preventing people from just doing prize draws on TVs. Either change the law or bring proper quizzes back. Bah.

The Morning / Lunchtime / Evening Guardian

FT + The Brown Wedge5 comments • 717 views

Its like G2, but from yr Printer!You have to hand it to the Guardian. When it comes to dipping their toes into new media they pretty much out do all the other trad news sources in the UK, with on the BBC’s online content coming anywhere near close to navigability and comprehensiveness. And their aggression in this burgeoning (but not particularly lucrative yet) market has shamed many other trad news sources. Does the Guardian Unlimited harm sales of the daily Guardian? Maybe, but I bet it harms the competitors even more.

But with every two steps forward, maybe you should take a step back. People like reading off of paper, and tend not to get their wireless roaming laptops out on the tube home.  Therefore G24 is that slight step back.

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Porn Porn Yes Porn I Said Porn

FT + Proven By Science + The Brown Wedge9 comments • 79,039 views

Hello. You are probably here because this page, on a pop culture site, is #6 on searches for “porn” on Bing.

There is no porn here. There never was porn here. There used to be an article about how using the word ‘porn’ as a metaphor – “disaster porn”, for instance – was a crass and misleading attempt to get hits.

But that’s algorithms for ya! After a bit I edited the original post so it had a header saying basically what the start of this one says – search on Bing, no porn, etc etc.

This now appears under the link on Bing, which was the idea, because I wanted to make it really obvious that there isn’t any porn at this site and so you shouldn’t bother clicking.

Bing being Bing, the stark declaration that the page was NOT porn actually helped it RISE up the rankings of a search for “porn”.

(If I was a pornographer paying an SEO money for a ranking of 7th or below on Bing, I would be a bit cross at this. Probably nobody actually cares about Bing SEO though. Want to know how many clicks this post gets via Google? NONE AT ALL. That’s because it ISN’T PORN.)

So, anyway, if you’re reading this you went looking for porn. On Bing. And clicked a link whose description said “no porn here”. Hey – it’s a strategy! Let’s not knock it!

You’re not alone, either – about 200 other people will be reading this post today, glumly flapping their dick around as they scroll down looking for nipples. Perhaps the sudden sense of community you’re feeling makes up for the average 1m 28s you’ve wasted here.

What’s that? You resent my assumption that you’re a man searching for porn on Bing? If you say so, dude. But if you’re looking for ladysmut we CAN help you – Freaky Trigger is happy to endorse mucky wimmen’s mag Filament. There! All solved! Happy browsing!

The Windy Shakey Barley

Do You See + FT2 comments • 488 views

The Feelgood Hit Of The SummerI like Ken Loach, I do, but he don’t half like tragedy. Looking for a Loach film with a happy ending is like searching for an original idea in the head of a horror film producer. And whilst happy endings aren’t very realistic, and often soft soap serious issues – FOR FUCK SAKE LOACH LIGHTEN UP.

So therefore I present a slightly happier, less hackneyed (and equally less true)version of his new film The Wind That Shakes The Barley: The Windy Shakey Barley.

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Houses with paper walls shouldn’t rock like this

FT8 comments • 739 views

Courtesy of the koganbot comes notice of this new cyber-hang-out: paper thin walls. Key attraction for our patrons must be daily reviews of a reasonably varied assortment of tracks by a hand-picked squad of trig-friendly writers who’ve thrown away the PR blurbs and gone native. Downloadable too — so yeah, it’s kind of like a smarter MP3 blog, but the names involved (e.g. xhuxx eddy; sterling clover; and that’s just in the first three days…) suggests this might be a cut above. Don’t know what the catch is yet — I guess they’ll be trying to sell something one day, and until then it’s a community-building op, but whatever, I’m sold. Go check it out, duDeZ. Then come back and post up a storm on your New! and Improved! FT.