The difficult joint number eleven post.
The very placement of these two extremely problematic films will suggest cowardice to you. And you would be right. I did not want a top ten that officially had these films in it. They are both too flawed to be put in that group (not that the top ten are in any way perfect). But both of these films actively repelled me at points in their running time, and were laughably up themselves too. One features Mark Radcliffe and Stuart Maconie pretending to be completely different DJ’s and failing. The other equally laughably suggests that it would be OK to stay in James Corden’s flat for a bit (and that you can pay for a flat in Manhattan by busking).
Those films are: GOD HELP THE GIRL and BEGIN AGAIN.
I think we were equal parts pleased and relieved to finish the Top 100 Songs of All Time. That is to say massively so on both counts considering FT’s grand history of unfinished lists. So when Tom turned in his arresting finalé for the #1 at the end of 2014, ten years after the list was “composed”, I found myself further moved to compile the posts into book form. Ebook form of course, we’re not tree-killing monsters, granddad.
You know, because free to read on the mobile internet isn’t enough. Right? Free to read on an ebook reader is what all the cool… LOOK I don’t know exactly why we did this. It’s a sort of experimental ground-breaking I suppose.
So follow the above link to the list’s index of posts and you’ll see we’ve added two downloads at the top of that page. Using one or the other of those you should be able to read the full text of the list with any of the ebook readers out there. We hope you like it.
Keep an eye out for our next mega-listicle: Freaky Trigger’s Top 23 Dogs of All Time!
* 22 galactic groats Mercury, not inclusive of VAT, residents of the EU please calculate your own local VAT and overpay your income tax appropriately, offer not available beyond inner solar system, page count may go up as well as down, may contain fonts, ebook printed on Forest Stewardship Council approved XHTML files
“Well, an early finish to the snooker tonight has left me twiddling my thumbs here at Alexandra Palace, so I’ll take this opportunity to introduce
my plans for world domination the final part of this year’s Freaky Trigger Poll. I’m sad to see that Olly Murs hasn’t made it through, I do love me a bit of Olly Murs – his cue action is second to none. Wait, I’m thinking of Ray Reardon. That troublemaker Olly Murs can barely work an autocue, let alone a snooker cue! Now if you’ll excuse me, I’ve got an episode of Coast to dig out…”
Thanks Hazel, see you in at the Crucible in a few months. On to our top 10!
“Greetings! I’m Einstein’s Theory of Special Relativity. You may remember me from one of this week’s University Challenge bonus rounds where one of the teams failed to recognise me at all, let alone answer questions about me and my spacetime continuum. It’s almost like they were operating from a different frame of reference! It’s been tough living in General Relativity’s
luminiferous ether shadow all these years (even though I was around first), so seems only fair that I get to introduce the next batch of this year’s FT Readers’ Poll – these tunes are totally Euclidean!”
Thanks very much, The Theory of Special Relativity! Here’s #20-#11.
Back in July I had a quick listen and rate of the first half of 2014′s number ones. Here’s the sequel, picking up where that left off. As before, this is based on very few listens, and you can confidently expect my opinions and order to change should I ever get as far as this in Popular. Off we go.
“Wotcher, HUMES! Sewer robot RO-JAWS here, taking time out from cleaning THARG’S CLUDGEY to bring you the second part of the 2014 Freaky Trigger comics poll. And MANKEY MOSES, it’s taken some bringing! Those nurks at Freaky Trigger have tried to cram FIFTEEN of 2014′s best comics into ONE post. Like HAMMER-STEIN says when stepping out of the ROBO-LAV after a hard night on the oil — GIVE IT SPACE TO BREATHE! They’re round the bend – THE U-BEND! The last time I saw anything this full, I was -”
That’s, ah, all we have time for from Ro-Jaws, but he’s right – we’re into the list proper of the 2014 poll, your Top 25 comics of the year. And here they are –
“Hi everyone, I’m Tasmin Archer. You may remember me from The Harry Hill Show on TV’s Channel 4, where following a freak accident that NASA have banned me from talking about, I died and was reincarnated as a badger, and was forced to parade up and down for the entertainment of the masses on a weekly basis. How I escaped from my mustelid destiny and returned to Sunderland in human form will remain a secret I shall take to my next grave. Just know this: I can never look Gareth Southgate in the eye again.”
Lovely to hear from you Tasmin. On to the next part of the countdown!
“Greetings from the future, pop lovers! We are robot pop duo Daft Punk and we’re happy to be kicking off the 2014 Freaky Trigger Readers’ Poll! We’re definitely not bitter about there being no 2013 poll (one excellent human voted for us this year anyway – your place in cybernetic heaven is assured). One more time: we’re not bitter AT ALL. If you want to see bitter, you should see all the red pen on Robin Thicke’s Christmas Card list! Anyway, a whole bunch of you biological entities from around the world voted this year and the list is harder, better, faster and stronger than we possibly could have imagined!”
Thanks Daft Punk! Without further ado, here’s #40-#31:
Just a last reminder – we are running two exciting POLLS this year, for the best tracks and best comics of 2014. You can still vote in them both! And, indeed, you should, if you have any interest in those things.
For each of them, the deadline is midnight tomorrow night, and you should send up to 20 nominations, ranked in order*, to:
email@example.com (for the POP POLL)
firstname.lastname@example.org (for the COMICS POLL)
*as was pointed out at the pub crawl yesterday, I failed to mention this when I started the comics poll. A Rigelian Hotshot for me, I fear.
A disco track is second on this list because – Rock Hall of Fame shenanigans notwithstanding – disco is almost universally beloved. If you’re a wedding DJ in a tricky spot, the late 70s will not let you down. Perhaps that was truer in 2004, when we compiled the list, than 2014, but even so a Whig History of Pop – one in which the aim is to create a sense of progress to the present day – might as well start with disco. This stuff is foundational. The intuition of disco’s discontents – like the Comiskey Park crowd who took the Trammps’ chorus on “Disco Inferno” as an order – was that disco was a break point, the end of something they had loved and the beginning of something they would not. This intuition was not entirely wrong.