MIKE SARNE WITH WENDY RICHARD - “Come Outside”
(30th June 1962)
As horrifying as the goriest death ballad or country tragedy, no amount of listens can change the awful outcome - our Wendy* leaves the club with Mockney lech Mike Sarne, stepping out for a promised “slap and tickle”. The delight in Sarne’s voice as his constant pestering wins him a fumble rather than a harrassment suit is one of pop’s more unpleasant sounds. The bad ending aside this is jaunty and catchy - though obnoxious - and Richard is good fun. But if ever a song was begging for an answer record to right its wrong, this is the one. 2
*yes, that Wendy Richard.
Site powered by
Anonymous on January 28th, 2006
Doctor Mod says:
I finally managed to hear this one. It’s not so much that it’s truly awful–a lot of pre-1963 pop is–but rather it’s so unabashed and absolute in its determination to wallow in absolute tackyness. If you must be awful, at least be that way deliberately. This one certainly tries.
This doesn’t quite meet the criteria for being pure camp–though schlocky it is in the extreme. I hadn’t realized that Sarne, in his later career as a film director, was responsible for one of the grand masterpieces of cinematic camp: Myra Breckinridge, in which Rex Reed is surgically transformed into Raquel Welch.
Some say it’s the worst movie ever made. I teach the novel in my queer lit course and, after giving the caveat that the contents of the film might be offensive to everyone and anyone can walk out anytime they want to, I show them this stunning gem of excess and bad taste. In ten years, only one student has complained–most of them LOVE it, and my best and brightest see it as a devastatingly funny critique and utterly damning critique of American social and sexual mores.
Maybe there really is something more to “Come Outside” than meets the ear–just what, though, I don’t know. But I wonder if Myra is lurking somewhere inside that song. In the film, she seemed quite adept at slapping–if not exactly tickling. Not the sort of girl to ask to “Come Outside.”
bramble on September 8th, 2006
Mike Sarne managed to have a follow-up hit, Will I What?, the same formula but with Billie Davis (of Tell Him and Jet Harris connection)doing he spoken bits. His moment in the sun sort of fitted in with the records of the time by Bernard Cribbens and the Carry On films. A bit saucy,but basically safe
Rob Hurtt on October 13th, 2007
Check out my answer to Mike Sarne’s record, my short film “Come Outside” on http://www.ubik-kollective.com
I sent Mike Sarne a copy and still haven’t heard from him although Ricky Gervais loves it, Hurtt x
Frances Berry on January 16th, 2008
Yes, I’m really old, but I remember Mike Sarne appearing as the MC for junion Criss Cross Quiz.
jeff on January 26th, 2008
fuckin wankers you are all nobheads
cunts n bastards
wichita lineman on May 31st, 2008
Wendy R did record an answer song of sorts called Keep ‘Em Looking Around, with its rather prim refrain “come along girls”. It was recorded as a duet with Diana Berry, aka Julie Samuel, Gerry Marsden’s girl in Ferry ‘Cross The Mersey, and Sarah Cracknell’s (real life) mum.
There’s also Ken Cope’s Hands Off Stop Muckin’ About in which he sounds exactly like Billy Fisher’s greasy nemesis (name escapes me) in Billy Liar. Cope starts off in Sarne mode - “I met this doll at the local ‘op and fancied ‘er right away”- but the payoff is that when this “doll” is all over him he’s all a fluster: “you’re creasin’ me mohair suit!” Uproarious.
And then again there’s The Boiler by The Specials, Come Outside produced by Alan Clarke.
I’ve always thought Wendy was playing hard to get on Come Outside, which Mike has figured out all along. So it doesn’t offend me… it’s just an irritating novelty song.
rosie on June 14th, 2008
wichita, you mean Stamp, don’t you? BL remains one of my favourite films. Funny how film easily survives the music of the time.