SEEED — ‘What You Deserve Is What You Get’

Do you want some German pop dancehall? YOU KNOW YOU DO. A current constant on German pop channels, this caught my attention because the band are obviously having monster good fun in the video by dressing up as cavemen and rampaging through downtown Dusseldorf (or wherever) rolling their shoulders and shaking their furs at passers-by. The cavemen burst into an office and are stopped in their tracks by…ELEPHANT MAN! On a sort of bubble screen. Yes this is the ‘Elephant Man Remix’ and a shoddier ‘guest spot’ would be hard to find. Elephant’s bit loses the hook and even the rhythm — in fact, let’s be honest, it’s just him talking. Something about R.Kelly, a shout out to Germans everywhere, that’ll do nicely. It keeps the little Elephants in shoes I’m sure. Perhaps the title is a coded warning to star-struck fans.

Do not download the remix, download the original instead which dispenses with dancehall’s raw invention and instead relies on the classic Mitteleuropean virtue of pitiless catchiness. No doubt a five-play wonder but no less entertaining for that.