11
Jul 00

Jejune

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Jejune asks a question: “is there any song on this earth more horrible and unlistenable than Roxanne by the Police? (Assumed answer: no.)”. A quick call to Tanya’s mobile elicits the following answer:

“Roxanne” by the Police is indeed terrible, in that it assumes that the attentions of one Sting would save the eponymous Roxy from a life of prostitution, rather than, for example, driving her to one in a desperate attempt to put the nasty Tantric man right off matters. Sting’s horribly affected cod-Jamaican accent is the icing of purest pus on this cake of shite. However, Sting’s solo song “Russians” is still worse than anything ever done by anyone who has ever lived anywhere. If the Russians do indeed “love their children too” they will as one rise up and cut their ears off rather than risk them hearing that track.

So there. In further news Pitchfork may apparently be redesigning. I rather unfashionably like Pitchfork, but why is so much – read: any – fuss made about redesigns? Somebody sent me an e-mail with this news using the amusing phrase “your scoop”. The Pulitzer surely awaits, or would if I was American. But hold! Amp To Rock has received the very same e-mail. Who is flattering these amateur journalistic egos / boring these amateur web critics? We have to know. Or on second thoughts, we don’t.

I also still love HumanClick. This evening somebody from Poland chats to me about Position Normal, which I think is fabulous. Ten years ago this would have been impossible. Mind you, ten years ago Position Normal would have been pretty improbable themselves.

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