PULP: Rock Star Cock Star

Jarvis’ flashed his arse at Mikey (in the animal kingdom a gesture of submission to an alpha male – it is a mark of Jarvo’s weediness that he could even subconsciously consider Michael Jackson an alpha male) because he didn’t like the Wack One’s messianic rock star bullshit. Sho why in the subsequent years did Jarvis:

i) Write a song comparing himself to Jesus? (And a bad one at that)
ii) Try to write a Bond theme, and when Cubby Broccoli nigh on laughed himself to death after hearing “Tomorrow Never Dies”, be so shameless as to put it out on a B-Side?
iii) Take the most hackneyed pop star route of all and write a political song (maaaan) which in classic pop star style makes no suggestions, no real accusations, and in fact says nothing other than that some politicos like a bit of nose candy. A considerably smaller proportion of politicians than Britpop stars, might I suggest. “Cocaine Socialism” was also put on a B-Side because Jarvis is a cowardly custard: even Roger Taylor had the courage of his convictions and stuck “Nazis” out as a proper single. Damn him to hell forever.