Feb 14

PWC14: Group E Match 1 (Switzerland, Ecuador, France, Honduras)

FT + Pop World Cup 201428 comments • 2,789 views

nino-y-og5 THERE ARE NO MINNOWS IN POP FOOTBALL. And Group E is proof, being home to the mighty Honduras, shock semi-finalists in the 2010 Tournament, and Europop 2010 stars Switzerland. France and Ecuador are pretty handy too. Managers this time out include Kat for Honduras, Megan for Ecuador, Jessica for France and the ever-enigmatic REZMAT for Switzerland.

Who will take the honours in this first round of songs? Who will be sent to the stands? The choice is yours. Vote for 2 out of 4 – the poll is below the songs which are below – THE CUT.

SWITZERLAND: Eluveitie – “Kingdom Come Undone”

eluveitie SIC NUNTIAT RESMASTUS MULLA, citizen coach: “Down we swept, that coldest of Alpen mornings, from our high frozen fastnesses and a Million Mighty Metal Matterhorns, into and across the smug plain footless plains of the leagues of our invader foes , the mighty uilleann ghostwind of Hannibal’s myrmidon celtic elephants full at our backs, and all the righteousness of liberation our wings and er centre-halfs and such. All Helvetios was divided into 26 Cantons? All? No! One eerie eyrie of indomitable unabsorbed Etrusco-Gauls still holds out against the Imperialist Global Running Sore, to menace the vasty paxo wastelands of defeated pseudo-musical flat mimsy sameness with RIFFING PEAKY TALLTH. Our goal is victory! All our many goals are the banana’d very nutmeg of triumph itself! WINTERTHUR is COMING, and the PEOPLE’S REVOLUTIONARY ETRURIA shall again be FROSTED FREE! This is high-pass humanity’s adamantine resolve! Stand and deliver YOUR MEAGRE SCORELINES!”

ECUADOR: Villano – “Dime Que Hacer

“Here is “Dime Que Hacer” by Villano, a buzzy rush of power pop from Guayaquil, Ecuador that you’d never guess accompanies a testament to the toll alcoholism takes. Kind of a bummer, but that juxtaposition is classic. Practice your air riffs or cry, your call.”

FRANCE: Youssoupha ft Ayna – “On Se Connait”

“Les Bleus go in with a few handicaps: a rookie manager, a moribund pop scene, and two successful strikers — Guy-Manuel de Homem-Christo and Thomas Baltanger — benched for overexposure. But like the actual French football team, the pop side has the advantage, however dubiously acquired, of drawing from talent descended from France’s former colonies. Thus a son of the late Tabu Ley Rochereau leads the initial charge onto the pitch, with the air of self-assured fun properly à la française.”

HONDURAS: Niño y OG5 – “Súbele El Volumen”

“The Honduras management are pleased to see the big players aren’t pulling their punches for the group stages – we’re absolutely relishing the prospect of a quality tournament, Brian. Our solid reggaeton back four have built on their predecessors’ excellent showing in the 2010 PWC, and we can confidently whistle at the opposition to Pump Up Their Volumes! And not just because we can’t find our headphones!”


E1: Which TWO Tracks Do You Pick?

  • FRANCE: Youssoupha ft Ayna 57%
  • HONDURAS: Nino ft OG5 52%
  • ECUADOR: Villano 43%
  • SWITZERLAND: Eluveitie 40%

Total Voters: 67

Poll closes: 13 Feb 2014 @ 11:00

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THE RESULTS: Japan’s aggression left their opponents stunned and terrified, and they took 3 points at a canter. Cote D’Ivoire rode out the storm to some extent at least, with 2 points out of this first game. Colombia can be proud of their efforts after a mid-game substitution, and net a point. And Greece’s tactics won admiration from some quarters, but unfortunately no points as yet. If Japan can keep up this quality, though, their group rivals will soon be left scrapping for second place.


  1. 1
    Alan not logged in on 6 Feb 2014 #

    My new fave DJ double act “Baltanger and Flacon”, who stay anonymous in their helmets made of decorative glass bottles. Vibe of course first with this obscure techno artist http://www.vibe.com/tags/thomas-baltanger

  2. 2
    Tom on 6 Feb 2014 #

    BTW, the French team have a couple of minutes of hanging around signing shirts etc after the game – please don’t take this as part of the actual match in your voting!

  3. 3
    lonepilgrim on 6 Feb 2014 #

    Switzerland’s high altitude training may prove to be more of a handicap in the sweltering heat of Brazil. Sure, they have high levels of energy and are not afraid to harry the opposition but they lack finesse and are vulnerable to more agile opponents.
    Speaking of agility, Ecuador charm the crowd with their dinking passes and clever back heels. They may look flimsy at the back but their disciplined use of the offside trap repeatedly frustrates more aggressive opponents.
    France’s front two link up well but the rest of the team look off the pace and their defence uncoordinated.
    Honduras by contrast play as a united team, each player matching the other for commitment. While they may lack elegance they get the job done.

  4. 4
    weej on 6 Feb 2014 #

    I’m not seeing any link / player for the Ecuador & Honduras tracks, is it just me?

  5. 5
    admin on 6 Feb 2014 #

    yes, it’s not right.hang on, digging in the back end…

    Hmm, now PAGING Fédération Internationale de Musique Populaire…

  6. 6
    Tom on 6 Feb 2014 #

    No – we are having trouble with the soundcloud embeds :(

  7. 7
    Rezmat of Zermatt on 6 Feb 2014 #

    The system has been changed to the Korean model. You can vote for whoever you want to, as long as it’s Switzerland.

  8. 8
    admin on 6 Feb 2014 #


  9. 9
    Tom on 6 Feb 2014 #

    It’s showing up for me on desktop but not mobile

  10. 10
    admin on 6 Feb 2014 #

    sadly the html5 embed is failing and falling back to flash. still on it.

    UPDATE: fixed ? (Looks good to me)

  11. 11
    Kat (@katstevens) on 6 Feb 2014 #

    OK the Honduras and Ecuador teams should actually be on the pitch now http://t.co/Je1n7z0wjj #pwc2014

  12. 12
    Kat but logged out innit on 6 Feb 2014 #

    Looks ok on mobile to me! TEGUCIGALPA MARCHES ON

  13. 13
    thefatgit on 6 Feb 2014 #

    This one’s a group of extremes. Switzerland hurl themselves into this match with avalanches of riffage. Hard for any opponent to get a toehold in this match, I reckon. And boy! They know how to intimidate. Reminiscent of some Scandi teams of earlier comps. But you have to ask yourself: does Guinness and fondue make an acceptable replacement for half-time oranges?

    Ecuador promise much early on, but their attack dissolves into some sour 80s indie-style hit & hope from outside the box. Yes, there’s something to be said for their midfield general, but they have to score to progress.

    France are good at this style of play, but I suspect they can move up a few gears as their tournament progresses. And you can tell their fans are willing to put their hands in the air and wave them like they forgot to bring their team scarves, but I found myself thinking more about their unused subs warming up on the touchline.

    Honduras bring it. Agile movement off the ball, neat passing and moving. Their striker plays with a smile on his face. Twerks for me!

  14. 14
    lartsaegis on 6 Feb 2014 #

    Against the softer, kinder opposition here is where the Swiss shine with perhaps the most successful metal performance on this grand stage period — so hats off to the manager for his pick here. It’s not an out and out mosh bruiser like Sepultura’s Roots, the technique on display here is certainly aggressive (and certainly it seems as if the manager is about to storm the field himself) but it’s definitely got that catchy riffage that makes for equal parts fancy footwork and fade throwing. The zeal shown here in the lyrics may net them a yellow card or two due to jawjacking with referees looking for tackles with a bit more force, but that woodwind in the chorus shows that they’re playing a clean game at core, and a swift one at that. Seemed power metal tinged, but with none of the obnoxiousness behavior I see from it. Very impressed at making such an outlier work, at least on my score sheet.

    Ecuador’s play here is definitely silver medal as I find their emo-pop effort appealing to me in reminiscence to groups like Texas Is The Reason or The Get Up Kids. They’re playing with bright sincerity and with about as much quickness as a rush of blood to the head, or a brain freeze — so that’s good enough for some dominant, quick tap-ins peppered through out the game. It’s good to see that style too transition to the Sur.

    France was third in my mind — I can’t deny Ayna singing her ass off and giving the song way more dimension and touch than any other part of it. She’s the star player in this match, for sure. She’s the feature, but she took center stage for me. Her support is average.

    Honduras bottoms out with me — I am no fan of reggaeton that I’ve heard and the pace/demeanor of this song did little to change my mind about the genre compared to the fusion tactics of Los Bohemios in 2010.

  15. 15
    Kat but logged out innit on 6 Feb 2014 #

    Worried fans may be relieved to hear that the Honduras management’s headphones have been DISCOVERED in our Head of Catering’s anorak pocket, where they have been hiding for the last month.

  16. 16
    Chelovek na lune on 6 Feb 2014 #

    The toughest round for me yet. A range of styles and gameplay that would be almost excessively difficult to assess and compare off the pitch.

    Honduras make a real impact, making lively, entertaining play, but fail to bring home the goods, or the goals they need. Too much passing back and forth, not enough breaking out. A bit too much disregard of the offside rule, too.

    Ecuador demonstrate a certain charm, even if at times it’s a bit of mid-80s Glasgow kickabout. Send a Postcard 7″ from Brazil. why not? And the kickabout is probably more of a Queen’s Park nature than the bigger names. And my Scottish half laments our perpetual failure to get past the First Round, and even the last time we did that seems too long ago. This would have done Jock Stein proud, and fine though this is, Ecuador will do better yet.

    The Helvetians play tough, but still pretty. Slayer crossed with 2nd album-period All About Eve? Not quite, but close. This is a daring lineup at this stage in the tournament , and not an unimpressive one. They beat Ecuador on penalties.

    France, though, have this in the bag, according to my scorechart, anyway. A low key game, starting out one way to outwit the opposition, and then changing tack and switching up the melody and then Anya runs out front and – – GOAL. Then switching back to the rap – and ANOTHER. BRAVO. On se connait.

  17. 17
    Kat (@katstevens) on 6 Feb 2014 #

    VOTE HONDURAS RT @dubdobdee http://t.co/Qg8hzFLyB2 … <– best round yet if you like bands named in ETRUSCAN :D

  18. 18
    Rezmat of Zermatt on 7 Feb 2014 #

    This is v for victory
    This is v for Vercingetorix
    Let them feel the gaulish violence
    Impetuous furor

  19. 19
    Garry on 7 Feb 2014 #

    Cote D’Ivoire management are taking a close look at this match with a view to future games. How will Reggae-influenced music – so popular in Abidjan – perform? Will we be involved in a tug-of-war over players with a France eying up musicians with African connections. And how will Celtic-influenced music do? (I’m only half-joking with the last one – I’ve found a Cote D’Ivoirian-born Celtic Harp player performing at a professional level.)

    As for this match I can’t see past the best-used-of-bagpipes-with-heavy-guitar midfield formation since Prolapse in the League of Leicester. I would hate to thing if this team met the Japanese one on the field. Blood would have been spilled.

    Winners also for France with two mobile strikers bewitching opposition defenders. And they are nice enough to acknowledge the crowd at the end.

    Ecuador are plucky but too well drilled, unable to counter the individual brilliance of the opposition.

    Honduras can count themselves unlucky. Despite plenty of fluid motion in the front third their hard man has come up against someone even harder while the defence is overrun by an opposition with gravity on their side.

  20. 20
    Jessica on 7 Feb 2014 #

    The French manager would like to take some time to acknowledge the able assistance of Cédric Le Merrer, and say YAAAAAAY for the return of Kat’s headphones!

  21. 21
    koganbot on 7 Feb 2014 #

    Did the Swiss manager mistype, meaning “Cantos” instead of “Cantons”? Or perhaps “Canters”? Disregard his tough talk and the team’s metal helmets; underneath it all, Eluveitie’s “Kingdom Come Undone” is a sweet scarborough or renaissance faire of a stomp. Bring on the flutes, I say! And the lutes! And a solid vote from me, as I was a folkie before I was a rocker.

    Niño y OG5 dub in several measures of the sweetly Clashical before they bring the reggaeton, and, even after they capitulate to the rhythm per se, the sweetness lingers. Another vote here for the sweeties.

    Which leaves hip-hop both forceful and tuneful from Youssoupha and Ayna; it’s the latter who delivers the beauty, perhaps a tad late. And (as the Ecuadoran manager correctly describes it) Villano’s rush of power pop, which is a rush of sugar pop as well: the rush never lets up, though my attention does. Overall, the fans got what they paid for, and more.

  22. 22
    Matt DC on 9 Feb 2014 #

    Poor old Ecuador are trampled by Switzerland here. The Swiss approach is bonkers but somehow it works – pace, power, aggression, naff faux-Celtic flutes, the lot.

    Very very tight between the other two, the French team pass it around nicely but you get the sense they can do this sort of stuff in their sleep, so I’m going with the Hondurans’ bounce and enthusiasm this time.

  23. 23
    Tom on 12 Feb 2014 #

    Time is running out to vote in this – only a few more hours…

  24. 24
    admin on 13 Feb 2014 #

    (NB the auto-closing of polls was happening daily at midday, I’ve updated it to check every hour)

  25. 25
    Tom on 13 Feb 2014 #

    I’ve now got all the Group G tracks, but no time to put it up until this evening, unfortunately.

  26. 26
    Tom on 13 Feb 2014 #

    And well done France!

  27. 27
    lartsaegis on 13 Feb 2014 #

    Gutted death-metally that the Swiss didn’t catch enough fire in the polls for even a slight return, such is the risk. I wonder what else they have up their sleeve for next time. I’m expecting bigger tings from France as the Cup goes on.

  28. 28
    Erithian on 18 Feb 2014 #

    Charming and stylish performance by the French winning out here, with Ecuador getting my second vote – always happy with a bit of power pop. The Swiss combination of Wimbledon’s Crazy Gang with Pat Nevin on the wing is a bit of an oddity.

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