Lytton Ewing vs the Lollards of Pop

Like the rest of the British nation the Ewing family sat around their wireless listening to the inaugural Freaky Trigger radio broadcast on Resonance FM. Obviously I thought it was grand, but here in full are the reactions of England’s newest geezaesthete to the show:

6.57: HOMEMADE DRONE by Savage Pencil thankfully does not fully awaken semi-sleeping infant.

7.00: It’s the Lollards! Contented smile on face during “Saltarello”.

7.03: Audible gurgle on (OK, vaguely near) mention of own name. No opinion vouchsafed vis a vis “London” vs “Ponce” pronunciation.

7.09: Wriggling and wrinkling of face provoked by Kat’s Spanish drum and bass. High-pitched squeaking as song ends.

7.14: Tracer Hand’s mellifluous tones soothe Lytton to sleep. (Irate father stymied in attempt to email the show by one M Sinker interrupting before address can be given).

7.19: Loud gasp and renewed wrinkling at MS’ scary story.

7.23: Burp to introduce “I Love This Bar”.

7.28: Grunt of disgust at Toby Keith being sued over same.

7.30: No reaction to Pete putting on a silly voice Doctor Pub, but Tim’s discussion of it causes twitching of legs and a further groan.

7.35: Rhythmic twitching of lower lip to opening of Rick Boshley, then long sigh. Rolls head to other side of cot. (This admittedly prompted by concerned Dad checking he hadn’t been sick).

7.40: Hits self on head during pop forecast, then settles head back on original side.

(Monitoring of Lytton ceases briefly while Dad goes to stir chorizo and bean stew)

7.47: Kat’s somewhat shaggy polar exploration story induces relative frenzy of wriggles, burps and grimaces. Ends up with head in hands.

7.50: Notable leg movement caused by Iranian hip-hop and EYES OPEN! (briefly) Faster breathing.

7.54: Much disturbed by Tim’s smoking and polonium story - blinking, frowning culminating in a single hiccup.

7.57: Mention of King of Corsica provokes angry faces, grunting and writhing.

7.59: Beth Ditto causes first actual crying of the show - or perhaps he is sad because the Lollards are going away. Handed to patient mother.

1. FT's Matt D’Cruz on December 13th, 2006

   More Lytton reviews please! I am particularly interested in his opinion of:

   a) Latest Dr Alban opus
   b) Graham’s recording of ILX karaoke
   c) OK Computer