27
Jul 06
IHM Title Watch: Shakira – Hips Don’t Lie
“Shakira! Shakira!” Wyclef Jean shouts all over this record, like a half blind old man stumbling around in the dark looking for his missing grand-daughter. Perhaps he got lost in the studios during the recording of Oral Fixation? Funny Shakira should call her album that as I have an oral fixation with Shakira herself. Mainly to punch her in the gob.
Wyclef for once is not the worst thing on a record he guests on. The worst thing is clearly its title. I agree in principle. Shakira is, strictly, correct. Hips Don’t Lie. But there is a logical fallacy inherent in the question. Much as Bertrand Russell pointed out regarding statements about “The King Of France”, the phrase is misleading. “The King Of France” is an empty signifier, as are Shakira’s talking hips. Hips don’t lie, because HIPS CAN’T TALK. Much like the old Western phrase “Dead Men Tell No Lies”. Because DEAD MEN CAN’T TALK. Put it like this Shaky, Hips can’t tell the truth either.
Still, I am aware than English is her second language, and she might not have had much help with the single. So lets put it pictures for her.
Hips must contain a 
to lie.
Speaking out of your arse isn’t good enough.
It might be said they can lie in the ‘becoming prone’ sense. Which I’m sure Shakira’s do.
Tom!
go go shakira you bast
hola shakira soy tu fan numero uno y te mando muchos saludos te admiro demasiado
No Shakira, choose me! I am your real number one fan!
Wow! For someone who mocks Shakira’s English, maybe you should take a look at your erring tendencies…
shakira ,you are my star,real star!you are my inspiration!I love you!
I stumbled across this and Tanya you made me really laugh! Ha Ha Ha! I love every school that Shakira builds but her god awful performances make me roll my eyes. The sex object thing, the goat like voice, the stupid robot dance. She is adored by many I know– and I adore her for her generoisity, but I laugh in sarcastic pleasure at her music, her videos, her career as an “artist”, her positive reviews and all of the bogus music awards she wins.
Shakira’s curves get the attention they deserve in today’s entry. I’m afraid there isn’t any continuity here, but I’m sure you don’t mind. As ever, if anyone has any further images from any of these series, please get in touch and I’ll fill in the gaps in a future post.