These days my favourite chocolate candy bar is Kraft’s XL-sized Lu bar

I especially like eating the ends of the bar. YUMMY! I have been trying in vain to search for a picture online. Instead I arrived in choco-heaven!

Cheapoh Food part III

Cheapoh Food part III
I seem to have the same attention span for food as I do for music. Last year I was knee-deep in Japanese cuisine, this year I am trying to learn all about Italian pasta. But there’s still a few Japanese recipes I adhere to, like the quick ‘n’ easy stirfry veggies ‘n’ chicken noodle concoction. You basically take a bag of stirfry noodles and a cut-up chicken filet, throw it in the wok. You stirfry it for… oh… ten minutes and then you spash a gallon of thick soba sauce. (My friend prefers Bull Dog Sauce.) To top it of, you throw in two bags of Blue Dragon udon noodles. You mix this for a few minutes until the noodles are warm. I usually pour some more soba sauce on it.

Last night we had a massive junk food fest

Last night we had a massive junk food fest after what seemed to be a never ending working day. We both ate a humongous amount of french fries and a bicky burger and a curry frikandel and some chocolate and… This morning we woke up with a dead rat in our mouth. URGH! This is just a scheme to tell you the french doesn’t refer to those damn fwogs but to the verb.

Ajinomoto is

Ajinomoto is japan’s MY favourite food brand these days. I am not referring to the animal food they produce - though it worries me, it might end up in my Cook Do sauces. So yes, I am a Cook Do afficionado (and a food-neurotic but that’s for my next post). It’s merely some bag of sauce packed in a carton box. But that kawai box contains so much information just to prepare some faux-ready made meal. Faux? Yep, Cook Do pretends to sell an easy meal but it’s actually a classique way to get the lazy arses to cook a dee-lish-us meal.

Addendum:I am now on a mission to find the Cook Do sauces - basically a sweet ‘n’ sour sauce - in XL bottles so I can splash it over my aubergine-onion-pepper-meat fry. Email me with links ‘n’ tips!

Write it down! If (y)our stomach NEEDS FOOD NOW, then the next recipe…

Write it down! If (y)our stomach NEEDS FOOD NOW, then the next recipe delivers that in about 15 minutes.

Cook 2 chicken fil(l)ets in ten minutes.
Heat can of creamy mushroom soup.
Add one (two, three,…) spoon of curry powder.
Cut up chicken in bite-size pieces.
Add cooked chicken to the mushroom soup.
Just before serving add about 200 ml of cream.
Pour over steamed rice.

Presto!

Boomkat’s Flipside

Boomkat fails in the method act with The Wreckoning. The surface has Moloko written over it, but then you scratch underneath and realize nothing’s THERE. So turn it over and revisit Flipside. (Gosh, I fell for that one, no?) That classique single is all about putting you on the wrong foot. A little - what… a LOT - like De Lillo’s Cosmopolis: The riddim of the city (shitty?) toppling over you. There’s nothing like falling down in a song (or book). The force of its cadence pushing you around. The lyrics? This is about hooks messing with your head - not your Ego, because Dance is about giving up that silly old thing called reason. The similarities between De Lillo’s syncopated style in Cosmopolis and Moloko’s Popafied take on Jungle, ie Flipside, is of course synthetic, only there because I am consuming both at the same time. Or was it waiting to be found? Whatever. And before I completely hop away to retro-dance heaven, let me add that I love ‘I am not a doctor’ for the same reasons I dislike it. It’s half-hearted, yeah, but I prefer talent wasted. This shows a human side and a promise that the next album could is better.

30 Seconds Over Dayton

30 Seconds Over Dayton

Brainiac’s ‘NOTH1NG 3V3R CHAN935′ would have been Walter Benjamin’s wet dream. It never really sings about the bricks, dirt and whatever else you can’t find outside suburbia… but it sounds every little bit like a collapsing city. I now hear the way you sucked every kling klang sound of Ohio into one song. It sounds as a mish mash of metallic screams trying to coax you into a foam-at-the-mouth rage. Therein also lies the deceit: the song seems to be made up on the spot, but the distortion, the funky cheerleaders-from-delirium-hell were meant to be there. There is no such thing as a spontanuous combustion on recorded vinyl. (Hey we’re Steve Albini territory here, we ain’t nevah heard of CDs!) So what about the title? Well, fuck that, everything changes, especially music. Every time you put on Hissing Prigs In Static Couture, you’re in a different mood, added some new experiences,… and how could it sound the same when you discovered Tim Taylor, the singer, died in a car accident? So we’re more removed from 1996, the year’s release date, but at the same time we’re also closer to the core of Brainiac/yourself.

The Roots’ Sacrifice

The Roots’ Sacrifice
Previously this Philadelphia Hip Hop crew claimed ‘Things fall apart,’ but with the right attitude the comeback can be miraculous. And it is. Phrenology - the most multi-layered title since “Muse Sick-N-Hour Mess Age” - is pure organic phunk. Be sure to check out that funkier than James White track ‘!!!!!!!,’ the Roots will RAWK YALL with the loose drums, Nelly Furtado and shoutouts. The dance beat is just there to make the message easier to take, the sound is as political as the words. The drums go back to the plantation, the shoutouts thank everyone from Digital Underground to the DOC. The Roots are aware of their… uh roots and want to make sure you, the listener, learn about it as well. The standout track is - for me at least - Sacrifice. Like all good art, it’s provocative and filled with soundbytes. Do not analyze the lyrics - this isn’t poetry, instead take it in as you dance. The Roots may not always hit the right target - I don’t believe that sacrifice guarantees you a reward - they have managed to worm their way into my top ten of 2002.

According to Frank polka and disco are the two most hated words in music

… I would nominate Radiohead and Indie - so a combination of the two genres is bound to keep every body off the dance floor. You can listen to Beer Barrel Polka on Frank’s website. And if that isn’t enough, Ethel Merman’s disco album will be reissued next year.

Quite frankly, if ever I encounter the inventor of…

Quite frankly, if ever I encounter the inventor of The (quirky and preferrably plural) Noun for Garage bands, I’ll hit him with my special edition Stratocaster. But for all you Datsuns/Barracudas and Vipers loving fuzz-freaks, I direct you to the Air Guitar Home Page. Just make sure you turn the volume down and let me air-scratch to the Coup.