Posts from 8th December 2003

8
Dec 03

THE ADVENT CALENDAR OF ALCOHOL – 8th December (7%-8%): Guinness Foreign Extra Stout

Pumpkin PublogPost a comment • 1,454 views

THE ADVENT CALENDAR OF ALCOHOL – 8th December (7%-8%): Guinness Foreign Extra Stout

I have been a fan of Guinness pretty much since I’ve been drinking. In the mid ’80s it had yet to achieve the kind of dominance it has now, and it was quite a treat to find that black pump-head on a bar. Even now, a pint of Guinness is often my choice when I find myself in a pub with nothing else I consider drinkable. It’s hard to wreck.

Probably my favourite way to drink Guinness is out of the bottle. This may be that I’ve had a disdain for the keg techniques of the draught stuff beaten into me by one too many Camra leaflets, but I like how smooth it is from the bottle, and I like the slightly manky-looking brown bubbles on the top, much more pleasant than the nasty uniform styrofoam I’m used to in the pub. Plus, nobody’s going to be drawing any daft, lopsided shamrocks in the top of my drink.

One of the tiny culture shocks I felt when I first moved to Peckham (non-afficionados should note that there is a large African population round my way) was the existence of Guinness Foreign Extra Stout. It was my own fault: I picked up a bottle of Guinness for home drinking purposes without really looking at the bottle. It was the Nigerian stuff.

It’s like the Guinness I’m used to swilling, but much more so. It’s sweeter and stickier and thicker and headier and much stronger (7.5% against 4.3%). I like it a very great deal, although I can’t imagine drinking it regularly. I think of it as an occasional treat, and I also can’t help but think of it as a winter drink: it reminds me a little of the kind of Chocolate beers and Christmas Pudding ales which begin to stink up our bar tops at this time of year. I’m not sure why I approve of Nigerian ‘ Irish stout but am so wary of novelty English ale, but that’s the way it is.

Anyway, here comes my thought for the day, almost certainly borne from gross cultural ignorance on my part, for which I apologise. On the rare occasions it’s really hot, I don’t generally feel like indulging in sweet, sticky things. So how come people in hot countries seem to like so many things which are so sweet?

I am not sure if I have ever seen a film as inconsequential as Master And Commander: The Far Side Of The World

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I am not sure if I have ever seen a film as inconsequential as Master And Commander: The Far Side Of The World. I have certainly never seen a film as inconsequential with such a long title. At the start of the film we are told that it is some time during the Napoleonic Wars and HMS Surprise is off to catch a French frigate the Acheron. Two and a quarter hours later, it catches it. Is this the turning point of the Napoleonic wars? Have the British finally outsmarted old Bonie? Have the crew of the Surpirse made a tactical discovery? Nope. It is a slow limp back to Portsmouth and the next adventure.

Except there probably won’t be a next adventure as the film did not exactly burn up the box office. And anyway, the next adventure would be a lot like this one. Pretty much everything you can do in a naval film. And it is very impressive. The film conjures up a scabs and all picture of the naval life in 1805 and does so by putting in all sorts of exciting sequences. Lucky Jack is a character that Russell Crowe can play in his sleep, stern yet occasionally troubled. Paul Bettany’s ships doctor is equally as important though, the shade to Crowe’s bluff exterior. It is a rather enjoyable piece of hokum all things be told. Which is probably what Peter Weir thought when he decided to plump on the tenth of Patrick O’Brien’s Master and Commander books to adapt.

But goodness me is it a boys film. There isn’t a single female speaking role, and the only women which are in it are pretty much bringing in the shopping. This is a film about men relating, men’s wars and men getting pissed together (the slaughtered on grog scenes are priceless). So only go see it if you can stand seeing men pretending to be brave, boyish and bold. Derring do, or derring don’t.

PrBySc Experiment ‘ Nivea for Men Vitamin Enriched Moisturizing Lotion

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An experiment to detect the effects of using girly moisturiser on a man’s face

Diagram and Apparatus

Method
I will be applying girly moisturiser to ONE HALF OF MY FACE. Which half (left/right) is only known to 2 people. I have devised a proper double-blind version of this experiment, bu it was too sodding complicated.

Results will be gathered over the next 6’8 weeks from anyone who wishes to contribute an opinion/evaluation. I will obviously make a nice graph to show the results of the evaluations of both halves of my face.

Bookslut

The Brown WedgePost a comment • 85 views

Bookslut: Less racy than the name suggests, a good book-centric blog, strong on links.